Long Time No Blog..

*Hoo* *Hoo* *Hoo* wah..what a thick amount of dust it has accumulated over here. I've vacated this space for months! To be exact, I haven't had a single post ever since I'm back in Singapore. Now that I have 6 days of break (including 2 days of work on weekends), I'm back here to give some energy to this ignored space.

Been back in Singapore for 4 months plus le. I've been keeping myself busy with school work and a little bit of work over the weekends at Kinokuniya. Life has been busy in school in Curtin Singapore. The first 1 or 2 months was quite a breeze with not much assignments due and haven't started work yet and also I did not allow myself to go out much to control my own expenses. But the next 2 months plus from September all the way till now has been a new challenge.

Schoolwork starts to pile up. Due dates for assignments are coming thick and fast. Several tests are coming at the same time. Moreover, I've got myself a part-time job in Books Kinokuniya as bookstore assistant. I chose to give myself this challenge of balancing studies with work, so I can have no complaints. So far, the planning of my time has been okay, and the balancing act is still working well. True enough, this new challenge hasn't been easy but at least i didn't achieve my aim of not making my parents to support my expenses. The monthly installments of the flat is enough for the father.

Work. I'm still learning the rope and still picking up skills. Perhaps, I haven't been able to be a useful help at the moment. But I'll try hard not to be a burden to the full-timers. School work has been decent so far. It started well. Grades were decent and it gave me confidence to keep going. Not forgetting, someone's encouragement in the past has been an inspiration to keep having faith in myself.

Recently, Radio 1003 has been playing clips of Mariah Carey & Whitney Houston's When You Believe. This is one of the songs I ever understand its lyrics due to it being one of the song which I performed while I was in choir in the primary school days. Lyrics from this song is an inspiration.

Next semester will have no mid-semester break at all, because of the 2 weeks break we had for this semester. Therefore, better time management is needed for next semester. Time to take each challenge in its stride and learn to conquer them! =)

There can be miracles, when you believe. Though hope is frail, it's hard to fear!

Rampaging through E51..

I decided to take out my E51, with my singtel SIM card, and switch it on to check for any incoming new messages. No idea what I was hoping to see but I just felt like taking a look. And so, there isn't any new messages apart from a message from an Australian telecom company's greeting message. This phone has been through thick and thin with me for 1 plus year in NS and a few more months before I got Tattoo. So I decided to scan at my old messages in my inbox.

Looking through the old messages made me recall my life after my ORD where my oldest sms was dated. And as I looked through each and every message and start to delete them, the two 'outstanding' incidents bring back some unhappy memories in my plain and dull life. One incident was a case of forgetting a secondary school buddy's birthday. And my other 2 buddies and myself were discussing how to make it up to that buddy and try to think of ways to mend the situation. It was a good ending after all and I'm more than pleased. It's years of friendship we are talking about here.

And another incident was stopping the contact with one army friend. I made this decision after some of the things he said and now that I come to think of it, it might be just a rash decision by myself. It could be a wrong move on my part. Just like the case with shingo, I just could have done better on my part, I guess. Like clearing things up, be more frank.

Nevertheless, from these two incidents, I think I can take more positives than negatives from the experience. Like learning to handle friendship better. Perhaps the incidents are unhappy ones, but I think if you can learn from the experience, it ain't that bad eh. But last year wasn't just about bad moments. At least, I tried not to be a coward. Two years ago, I ducked away from you, hide in my own shell. I'm glad I decided to come out of my shell and face the fact.

This leads me to thinking why does human or rather myself, only get to learn only after certain things has happened. When things or people are by your side, or with you, normally tends to take things for granted, it will always be when you lose or going to lose something, then you will learn to treasure it more. Cheap. So cheap.

today..

it's been a while since I've wrote something. Missed you, blog! Haha..This week has been a pretty good week. I feel my luck is on a high. Very high indeed. First, it happens with the academic matters. My first report written in over 2 years plus was a 2.95 out of 5. Wasn't good at all. And this week, I got back my 2nd one. It was a 4.35 out of 5. Whoa! This wasn't anywhere near my expectations. I had lost all confidence in that module as I feel I couldn't achieve the results I want. This was the 1st of 2 pleasant surprises.

The other pleasant surprise was with my bio practical worksheet. It's a well-known fact that I suck extremely at bio, it's to the point of being atrocious. The worksheet wasn't done well in my opinion at all. I expected a mark of less than 2 out of 7. Yes, 2 or less out of 7, that was my expected results. It was THAT bad. I wasn't feeling good for the past week. I fear going for the coming practical and seeing such results. I have enough of such results in poly year 1 in Science and Food Preparation, i think i got results like 0.5 out of 5 before. It sucks. I wasn't someone confident in the first place, getting such results only make it worse. Anyway, enough of the sidetrack, back to my bio practical worksheet, I got it back in the lab. I looked at my results, I looked at the name on the worksheet. It's mine! Absolutely shocking! In a pleasant way, actually. I got 5 out of 7. It wasn't well done but comparing the actual result and my expected one, it definitely came as a shock. No joke.

And also, the celebration today. It was a memorable one. I'm not those that like to have a birthday party. My only birthday party was when I was still a kid and it was a mini gathering with relatives. Since then, my birthday have been a meal with good friends and having singing session, bowling, or catching a movie. Something simple, BUT I'm more than contented with such activities. First and foremost, to have friends to remember my birthday is good enough for me. It don't have to be a spectacular day, simple things are enough to make me feel happy. Because I believe in having things simple and it would be the company of THE FRIENDS that makes the day special. I don't long for any special treatment or any special way to celebrate. I might give the impression that I don't like to celebrate my birthday but it's because I don't want my friends to make that effort to plan. Planning isn't easy.

And today, it was a day of the simple things happening together. A dinner at "Little Hong Kong" at Sunnybank. Followed by, having a chocolate cheesecake at Mount Coot-tha, our favourite place during my first weeks in Brisbane with my friends. And on the way back, we saw the moon being soooo close to us. It's like the moon don't look like it's high up there at the sky, it looks more like a hot-air balloon actually. Not to mention, the sky was clear and stars are brightly lit. And I got a meaningful birthday card as well. All these events are simple but when you know that your friends take the effort to get things going. It's just touching. So, thanks to wee kiong, linda, mickey, H, jie xin, xiang hong and jie xin's sis (jie ying)! It's memorable and it definitely holds a place in my heart along with my 17th birthday. Great friends, great memories. I can be able to write my emotions down but it would be rare to hear it coming from my mouth.

Noticed that I removed the birthday on my facebook profile? I purposely removed it. I'm just a nobody on this world, I don't need so many wishes. I'm more than contented with wishes from true friends.

i learn this from taiwanese idol drama

like my title says, i learnt something from an episode in a drama. It was a dialogue of an actor from the show. He said that no matter how he made changes to his external looks, what's inside him remains the same. After hearing it, I pondered about it for a while. And it was well-said. Like for my case, no matter how much I lose weight, or how much more muscle mass I gain, I still feel inferior and lack confidence. I guess, I need to work from inside out then. But can I do it?

Anyway, today's Mama Day. =) Happy Mama Day!

JJ Wanderers..

my mind have been wandering around quite frequently. And as it wonders, my mind just keep thinking about more and more things. Can't seem to remove them out of my head either. Before I came over here, I thought as a single child, and being used to loneliness, staying alone at studio apartment won't matter much. But I was proven wrong! Because I'm the only child, I don't like to be alone, and I'm lonely not because I want to. But at home, at least I still can crap, or find my mum to have someone to talk to, physically. Now in my room, there's no one to talk to. And sometimes, you will long for someone to talk to.

One matter I gave some thoughts to, is whether to be contented with life or to be ambitious? For me, I'm pretty contented with life. Well, I've got doting parents and met great friends along my life.

In primary school, I have giap seng as my best friend. He's top in class and I'm last but that didn't stop him from being my friend. Had a great 4 years of primary school friendship, didn't met for 8 years (in secondary school, poly and army) until recently, and I hope this friendship shall continue for years to come.

Then comes to secondary school, I met shaun on the first day of school, we had no other friends from primary school in that secondary school and from then on, we had a great 3 years of havoc time with kelvin until shaun left for UK. And then, I've got kit, huat, bert, sont & juan who have been wonderful. Its hard to meet bert & sont that often nowadays as compared to kit & huat due to their busy schedule.

And then in poly, I was close with wai, shingo and kenny, till some unpleasant things happened between myself and shingo. But nevertheless, I got to meet yx & lil and with the 4 of us (wai, yx, lil & myself), our activities are always happening and fun.

And more recently in BMT, I got to meet terence & hz. Am still in good contact with terence but with hz, unpleasant things happened and I don't meet him nowadays. And also, my mu friends, kenny, rabbit, yin ki, cm, cj, jw, yx, kp, da kc & xiao kc. A nice bunch of people who showed me the detemination needed in life.

Last but not least, my 'family' that I know here in altitude. Kiong, mic, H, jx, linda & xh. If I can keep in close contact with all the great friends listed, shouldn't I be contented. Of course, not forgetting my parents.

But to be contented easily doesn't necessary spells good stuff. Because that means I don't have the fighting spirit. And that leads to the other scenario of being ambitious. You need to have fighting spirit to be ambitious, without fighting spirit, that should just be called wishful thinking. But then, with ambitious people, thats where I think people starts to lose themselves. 'Coz with one target achieved, people starts to aim for more and tougher targets and sometimes they lose themselves in it, make enemies because of their goals, lose loved ones. And at the end of the day, this isn't what they want. Ouch! Anyway, I think I really think too much le. I guess I'm really bored. :p

me = pig!!

Yeah, like the title suggests..I'm really a pig. I'm supposed to wake up at 6 plus today. Prepare, and head off for lecture. But I overslept till 12 noon! Sleep at 5am? No excuse. Slept for 2 hours the previous day? No excuse either. The 2nd time I overslept since I came here. The first time was because of my laziness, I kept snoozing my alarm clock. This time round, I didn't even snooze my alarm clock at all! I just slept through the annoying noise of alarm clock. Nice one, JJ..really nice..

So, from tonight onwards, I'm going to have 3 alarms to make sure this won't happen again. An alarm clock, an alarm from handphone & an alarm from ipod touch. If this doesn't help...I really don't know what will help? Maybe someone crying out "Fire! Fire!" might help. =(

My post stops here. There's nothing interesting below. Till next post...

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Ever wondered if you have worked so hard for something and when you get it, you didn't want it THAT badly and start to regret. I can't remember when I heard this before or where exactly did I see this from. This made me give it some thoughts. And I find it pretty true. Let me state an example. I'm not sure if this is a good example to give. For example, you've known a girl. And you think you really like her alot. Then put in a lot of effort to try to know her, woo her and in the end, got together. But once you two are together. You realised you like her but not exactly in the form that you long for her to be your girlfriend, you just feel comfortable with her around, that's about it. And by then, it's already a few years into the relationship and starts to regret. What will you do? Tough situation isn't it?

Ah..! Thought of another scenario. Say you aren't a very academic inclined student. Then you went to a open house by a university. From there, you've gained interest on a particular course. And to get in, you need good grades. So, you mug & mug and you've managed to get the grades necessary to get in. And you've got in! And so, you started studying that course and in the last year, you've realised this isn't what you want, how? Finish it & continue to work in the industry related to the course? You could be unhappy in the job. Finish it & work in another industry? If that's the case, what's the point of studying hard to do the course & work in somewhere irrelevant. But, that should be the better choice though.

My point is, sometimes you work real hard to get something you think you really want. But is that the thing you really want? Will you be really happy when you've achieved it? Will you regret that you've spent so much effort & you aren't that happy when you have it? I would say, follow your heart. Whatever it is, it's most important to be happy. So what if you are drawing huge salary, holding a high position in your company's hierachy with nice car & nice house but you've missed out on involvement in your family & gatherings with buddies because of work commitment. These are things where u can't buy with $$, would you be happy, even with lots of $$ with you?

Perhaps I'm reading too much into it. But then again, you will only know if you are happy with anything unless you've worked hard for it and put in effort to achieve it. Without trying, you wouldn't know. Hah. I just contradict myself, isn't it?

Hope no one reads till this sentence and hear my ranting.

Easter break..

It's been slightly over a week since my previous post but many things has happened. Let's talk about studies first. Got my 2nd assignment for Food Sensory back, got 9/10. Pretty pleased with it because it was worth my effort. But I felt jealous when i saw friends getting full marks. Because initially their answers weren't correct until we discussed answers. Now I know why kelvin don't like to share his answers to maths homework in secondary school. I can totally understand how it feels to work hard just to give answers away. But then, we cannot be selfish, isn't it?

The planned road trip for Easter to New South Wales was cancelled and was replaced with 2 day trips. But before the day trips start, we went for a singing session at SunnyBank & a trip down to Fortitude Valley a.k.a Brisbane Chinatown. The singing session was a tat too short 'coz we have 7 people and we only had 3 hours slot and during that time, dinner was provided as well. But it's good enough to be able to sing! Fortitude Valley was average, Singapore's Chinatown is much much better. There's only restaurants & pubs there. Anyway, it's popular for its clubbing lifestyle. After fortitude valley, we went to Mount Gravatt. The location of the mountain is good, as you can see a large area of Brisbane. But the lookout was partly blocked by the vegetations and it wasn't as good a lookout as Mount Coot-tha.

Here comes the day trips. First, on Sunday, we went to this lake which is about 30 mins drive from home. That place is really WOW! The water is clear. Surroundings are peaceful, a really nice place to chill. And then, we went to Red Cliffe. Yes, you didn't see wrongly. It is Red Cliffe. There's a beach over there, just like Surfers' Paradise. But once you're there, you'll know why Surfers' Paradise has the word 'paradise' and Red Cliffe have the word 'red'. Surfers' Paradise is really like a paradise as the scenery is great and the water is gorgeous. But Red Cliffe has slightly muddy water, carparks there aren't the best either. It's hard to move around.

Next, was the Monday trip to Byron Bay & Mount Tamborine. Byron Bay is located on the outskirt of New South Wales. So, by car, it took us 2 hours to get there from Brisbane. We left at 3am, in the hope of getting there for sunrise. So, there we set off with all 7 of us in our 'uniform', which is our personalised t-shirt. But things didn't go too well, as the engine oil for one of the cars was used up. And we took a bit of time at the petrol station before we head off. We were running out of time for sunrise as we can see the sky starting to turn bright as we cruise on the highway.

But nevertheless, we reached Byron Bay, and get to see part of the sunrise. The beach over there is heavenly. Perhaps there's other places where there's nice beaches. But this is definitely one of the best scenery attraction that I've ever been to. And as we scout around the whole bay, the view from the lighthouse is even better. Pictures should be up on Facebook soon. But after Byron Bay, things didn't go too well. H returned to his car, feeling emo. And some traffic hiccups happened on our way to Mount Tamborine, in Gold Coast. And in Mount Tamborine, H & jx had a quarrel. That made the trip not as wonderful but nevertheless, I was happy with my first road trip ever. Now that I've enjoyed myself, it's time to immerse into studies.

mood = low..

All the fun shall end le. Just received the marks for my 1st assignment today. Got a 6/10. Disappointed. Seems like I could be getting one of the lower marks? It's not like I didn't put in any effort leh. Perhaps I'm really rusty after not touching any academic items for 2 years. But I was really expecting a much better grade as I was quite confident when I completed it. The 2nd assignment has got to be better. Felt really disappointed and ashamed today. One lesson learnt.

Easter Break is going to start this weekend. I'm going off for a road trip with friends but I doubt I'll enjoy it thoroughly, 'coz my mind will be full of studies. Mid-semester tests are coming up. And there's this biology module which is extremely scary for me, and chicken feet for others. No class on this wed, so it will be revision day! I couldn't understand most of the items taught for that module, and it is supposed to be basics! u sure its basics?! Throw me back to secondary school then, let me get my basics right first.

Anyway, I think I can proudly call myself the Microwave King. My cooking is mainly done using microwave. I cooked rice with microwave, cooked sausages with microwave, heat up milk for making mocha in microwave, and microwave bread too. This is for not having enough utensils & cutlery.

It's time to meet the assignments and notes le. Bye...~~

3rd time to Mount Coot-tha!!

I really love going to Mount Coot-tha! I like the car ride there. And when you're up there at the viewing area, the night scene of the city area is great. Just imagine a big cake & all the buildings' lightings are like candles on the cake. It's really nice. Not forgetting you can see many stars in the sky. Which makes the place good for sky-glazing. By far, my favourite hang-out place.

These few days has been quite happening even though we're all pretty low in morale. Yesterday we went to Queensland Transport Authority, but H couldn't change his car plate yet. Then we head to Indooroopilly where we have dinner & movie. We watched Remember Me. It was not a bad show but the cinema wasn't fantastic. It's cheap because we get to watch it at student's price of 7 bucks but the sound system broke down for some time in the middle of the show.

We went over to RSPCA to look at cats & dogs this afternoon and head down to Sunny Bank, which sells alot of Asian stuffs, for a dessert & walk around. Then we had pizza for dinner & watched a movie at kiong's unit. And then, lastly we head for Mount Coot-tha.

The entertainment part of my life here is pretty fun. Food is quite good too. Cheap & good. But I haven't really get down to serious studying. There will be more assignments to do & there will only be less play. But for now, I shall enjoy the fun first.

Points to Ponder..

This post is mainly inspired by wai's recent post. I saw 1 word that give me inspiration to thrash out my feelings. And that word is...good-for-nothing. Haha.

Why this word inspires me leh? It's 'coz I think I'm a good-for-nothing too. I can't think of something that I can look back & really be proud of. Nothing to make my parents proud of me. Nothing to make my friends proud of me. Absolutely nothing! I don't care about myself. Parents happy, friends happy, I will be happy.

And with this recent issue that is bothering me, the feeling that I'm useless is even stronger. Well, I find my trip here to Brisbane for studies is too big a step forward. I took such a long time to come out with this decision but yet I think it's not a good one at all. Dad needs to pay instalments for home, Mum is using her savings to get me here. Yes, I should stay but I'm sure the burden will be bigger on their shoulders & I DON'T WANT THAT TO HAPPEN. First of all, they're not young anymore, by that I mean, they should be at the age where they can retire & enjoy life more le. Still need to support me to study overseas? Big task..

My situation is different from most people. Every single step or decision that I made, must be more careful, the chance to commit mistake must be as close to as zero. I need to think of my future & at the same time, able to get a good job so that I can provide better life for my parents. 'Coz I should be the one supporting them now not the other way round. My parents aren't giving me any pressure, I'm the one harbouring all these thoughts because I think with all the care I got, they deserve better.

Which brings me down to where I see myself in the future? Dunno? What I will be doing? Dunno? I'm not really picky on what to study & what to work as. Right now I'm at a crossroad. There's many ways to move forward. But I don't know which is the better way.

But right now, I'm leaning towards a more practical route, dreams can come later. My ice cream parlour, wait for me!

Time to do my assignments! Keep playing games & haven't touch my assignment.. =(

no class today.. =)

There's no bio lab today. Woohoo~! Slept till 12pm then wake up. Feels fully recharged. Prepared my brunch, which is cheese & ham sandwich. A cheap & easy to prepare item.

Supposed to start working on my mini Major Project today. But i only did a little bit of research. Spent my time playing FM & going to Toowong to search for a cheap printer. Can't delay starting work anymore le. MUST do it tonight. And I met keith in Toowong while doing my shopping. He said I had slim down ALOT. Well, I don't really know why but I feel so much lighter than before, so I think that's a good thing?? But my interaction with him was only in year 1 or year 2 of poly, so I must have been fat or I had changed. Anyway, he was quite shocked to hear of me coming to study alone. Why ah? This is not the first time i see someone having this expression when I told them that I came alone.

Anyways...finally I saw some sunlight today after like 3 consecutive days of rain. But its not like today didn't rain, its just that today's slightly better than any of the previous 3 days. Hopefully, there won't be any rain for the next few days.

5th Day in Brisbane..

How's it going, mate? Time passes quite fast, & before I know it, orientation is ending & school is going to start soon.

Well, I wasn't that excited about starting school before I came over. And on the first day I'm over in Brisbane, I wasn't feeling that fantastic about living in a new environment. But up till today, I'm getting used to life here. Just that, I think my chatting with friends in the balcony is pissing the neighbours off! I even got a notice from the manager of the apartments.

Friends have been great. Know a few Malaysians, 1 Hong Konger & several Singaporeans. The feeling of going back to school is coming back & knowing some new friends certainly helps.

Been going to different friend's unit to cook dinner for yesterday & today. And today after dinner & a comedy session, we decided to take a stroll around the suburb, Taringa. We walked down King's Rd, which was a very very steep road. Going down was fun. Jogging back was even better. Next up, we went to Princess St, which was like a 'W' shape road. And we did all these at about midnight. Fun!

But but but, school hasn't been nice so far. First, it was the academic transcript issue. Next, its with the my diploma certificate. That guy just likes to find new stuffs to deal with me. And after yesterday's 1 hr 30 mins of meeting that advisor, the courses he arranged for me have clashes for my timetable. I went to school to ask him about the clashes, he refused to change the courses & he asked me to make sacrifice loh. Thanks ah! Good one! I'm sure to miss 1 lecture per week for the course, which is a biology-based one. And the sacrifice I have to make is sure to miss the bio course. The other 2 courses, only has 1/2 lecture slots whereas the bio course has 3 slots. But missing a lecture certainly is not helping me since its my weakest subject.

Anyway, having a dilemma now. Been wondering whether I've made the right decision...too adventurous? We shall see. Right now, I'm keeping my options open & I shall take things one step at a time. =)

life in Brisbane..

This is the 3rd day since I've touched down to Brisbane. Its quite a nice city. A different environment. But these few days it's been full of ups & downs. But nevertheless, its an experience gained.

First unpleasant thing I got here was not being able to get to my room. Imagine being here alone, not knowing anyone. And arriving on Sunday 6am, with no one working in the apartment's office. How nice isn't it?

If it wasn't for a Singaporean uncle, I think I prolly have to sleep on the streets. Haha. Luckily he got me to know his son, who lend me his phone so I can call someone from the office for help. And that's the first friend I know here. And after knowing him, I got to know a Malaysian dude. And now at least I have a few friends.

But the downside of coming here is, it is stressful enough to know that most Singaporeans who come over here are mainly scholars. And I got here, through barely scraping through, i guess. And the standard of living is quite high, higher than I expected. If I think I'm placing too much burden on my parents financial after keeping my expenses to the minimal, I really have to look for other solutions.

And after going for the opening talks by my faculty & my course, it only gets worse. I think the Professor in charge of Food Technology & Food Science really is not flexible. He say he needs my ORIGINAL academic transcript to help me with the exemptions & advise me on the choosing of courses. But when I told him I got the photocopied version instead of the original one, he still insist on me getting him the original one. Well, why I'm pissed is, I didn't bring the original copy with me. I got a photocopied one. And I don't understand why he have to stand firm on his decision on such issue? Both are the same stuffs, and now I need to ask my parents to send the transcript over just to make him happy with the colour logo of TP. Purposely don't want to bring the original transcript in case I lose it, & now I still have to bring it over. Haha.

Anyway, feel like joining 2 societies. 1 being the Singapore Student Society, the other one is the society for my school. Hopefully I'll have time for studies, and hopefully I don't have to pay. =)

Chinese New Year celebrations & flying off to study

This CNY has not been the best of CNY for me. My mind wasn't on enjoying it. My body wasn't able to enjoy it either. How to enjoy when I had diarrhoea from CNY eve to late afternoon of CNY 1st day. I didn't have a good sleep thanks to my visiting of toilet throughout the night on CNY eve. So, I will make this my final warning to treat my body well.

Putting the diarrhoea aside, CNY has becoming repetitive to me. After doing the same sequence for so many years, I don't really feel the hype. Maybe because collecting hong bao don't mean the same to me anymore. When I was young, I so looked forward to CNY because getting hong bao = alot of $$. Nowadays, having hong bao means getting the good wishes from the seniors. In fact, I had the idea of stop receiving hong bao when I'm 25. I'm starting to feel embarassed receiving hong bao. Its like I'm able to support myself le & if any peers around my age gives me any hong bao, its got to be awkward to accept them. But having conversations with relatives are nice. But my cantonese is still sub-standard.

By the way, this year I received 'lai si' apart from hong bao. It was meant to be good wishes for my studies in Brisbane. It was a very nice gesture from relatives from my father's side. Truly appreciate it. With the wishes, it will spur me on to work doubly hard.

I met up with giap seng on the 2nd day of CNY. It was great to see him again. I was afraid topics can't flow naturally after not meeting him for 8 years. But it turned out well. We ended up chatting for hours. And if it wasn't for dinner time, I think we can continue for even longer. I will definitely meet him more often. The first true buddy that I met.

Kenny came over to Kallang this afternoon to meet me for lunch before my flight tomorrow. Both him & rabbit got me a headphone as a gift. It came as a surprise for me. But then again, knowing Kenny, that's his style of showing concern. This wasn't the first time he did that. And we were even together in getting gifts to our regulars as ORD gifts, stirring up a havoc that set all of them kaypo to know each other's gift. And if I don't have things to do, I think we can chat longer than we did before he goes back to NTU for his class. In fact, he make the trip to & fro NTU and Kallang just to meet me for lunch lah. Appreciated. =)

Tomorrow will be the day when I'll be away to some unfamiliar territory for studies. Uncertainties are growing, my thoughts are flying everywhere. However, at this point of time, what keeps me going is the thought of my life after these 2 years of studies. Its what made me came to this decision. I'm actually gave myself a huge load to carry on my shoulders. Not sure I'm doing the right thing. But this is currently spurring me on & this thought is diverting other unhappy thoughts.

I just heard this quotation not long ago. Something new that I learnt. Here's the quotation: Being overly humble is being hypocrite. Anyone reading this post, ponder over this. So this is how being too humble turns out in the eyes of others.

大嘴巴-喇舌....This song just stayed in my mind the moment I'm hooked to it! This song so catchy, just listen to 喇舌 can le, still need to 喇舌 meh? :p

juz look at how lazy i am...

Haven't touched my com since my last post. This show how lazy & reluctant i am, to use my com. Got Ipod Touch mah, so can surf net on it, hence giving me fewer reasons to use the com.

So, I shall categorise what my activities for the past few 2 weeks.

Fun

Had a happening time 2 Saturdays ago. Firstly, I went out with huat & kit for a movie. So touched that kit managed to squeeze some time out from his insanely tight studying schedule for a meet-up. It was 'coz I'm leaving for studies soon, and thus he's willing to make the sacrifice. I came home after the movie, and not soon later, I was out again. This time, with cw, lil & yx to Party World for some singing session. Sang from midnite to the wee hours of Sunday morning. And I end up feeling satisfied from the 2 activities for the day.

Work

Finally into the last day of work. And it is going to be a half day. Getting really tired from all the work le. I haven't have a good break since ORD 6 months ago. It's about time I get a little bit of rest before going for studies. Talking about work, the colleagues at NTUC have been very nice & kind. They have been nice towards me, even though there's hiccups once in a while. And they even treated me & my buddy for a meal last week as a farewell celebrations. I'm quite lucky for the past 2 & half years. Be it army or in NTUC, I've met pleasant people along the way.

Food

I've been a very egg-y person for a week or more. In fact, i think its until today then I stop having eggs DAILY. It's a record for me! But what's there to be proud of?!?! LOL...

Exercise

Couldn't do any bit of jogging for the past 1 week after doing OT for the past 4 days. I will be so tired after work, but I'm going to compensate the lack of jogging with some badminton this week.

Another bit of exercising which I've been crazy about is doing weights. Terence was telling me my arms are very big already. Is it really that big? I can't judge it. If it is really big enough, I'm going to put a stop to this exercise. It's not my aim to become a gorilla.

Rings

Huh? What rings, I'm talking about, you may ask? Cheese rings!! Duh!! Nah...that's not what I'm refering to. I'm talking about the rings people wear on their fingers. I bought 3 rings recently. I'm crazy over rings as accessories. I may not wear rings often. But I actually have SIX rings at home. But I will not wear 1 special ring that I have. It was a gift I received, and this gift is meant to be a gift to a special one....

Haiz, no $$ already, still willing to spend $$ on these. Crazy.

And that shall sum up my life for the 2 weeks. Don't have a lot of $$ to spend, thus I'm keeping my life to be simple. Nothing spectacular. Nothing happening.

When fate comes, I don't take initiative. When fate don't arrive, I becomes emo....i don't wish to say this, but I really deserve it.

I've been thinking alot about whether I can adapt to my new phase of life after CNY. Keep thinking this, thinking that. I think I haven't study ah, I start killing brain cells loh.

Enough of all these emo-ness...

Song-Of-The-Moment -匿名的好友....

不能握的手 从此匿名的朋友
其实我的执着 依然执着
却决心和你不再联络
不能握的手 却比爱人更长久
当所有如果 都没有如果
只有失去的拥有 最永久

round up of the last 3 weeks

It wasn't a happening period of events. For the past 3 weeks, it has been work, work and work, a little bit of jogging and a little bit of chilling out with friends.

Here's what I've done:

01/01/10:

Met up with poly buddies for supper @ Clarke Quay. A nice chatting session to start the year.

08/01/10:

Went with secondary school buddies to JB for shopping and chill. It was meant to be an 'overseas' holiday before I get over to Brisbane for studies. It was a decent trip. I was controlling my budget very tightly, hence I got practically nothing back. Most of the time, I was the one doing the shopping, the 2 of them were just following me. I don't quite like that but they don't quite shop so it was alright. It will be better if bert will be able to join us, but since he's still in army, the idea of him joining us is gone. This marks the start of myself going out of Singapore. Actually, i like the idea of going for a short break. It's nice to get away from the vibrant & fast-paced lifestyle here, to just go away for a break to relax.

09/01/10:

Went for my pre-departure seminar @ AusEd. There were alot of people going for the seminar, some with their parents, some went alone, like myself. It was nice to hear about the assurance from the head agent, who is a graduate from Aussie in New South Wales. He shared his experience and gave us some advice. I met a new friend, who is going to UQ as well, indirectly through ryan.

16/01/10:

I didn't do much on this day. But I got something I've been craving for. I bought a pair of sunglasses!! It wasn't the design I loved the most. It also wasn't the brand I wanted. But it is definitely within my budget. Now, I'm eagerly waiting for the shop to change the lens to my myopia degree and then I can use it. =)

17/01/10:

'Escaped' to Batam with my parents. It was my first time there. The place was better than I thought. I had a few first times over there. 1st time buying home-made kueh lapis. 1st time buying a counterfeit item. 1st time going for massage in massage parlour and the massager is a lady. It was thus a memorable trip. And this marks the end of a frenzy period of overseas trip where i leave Singapore 3 times in 2 months.

When this week ends, it will be less than a month to my studies. How time flies. How I wish time flies over there as well...

With that, it's once again time where I should do some yearly routine., which is to reflect on myself for the past 22+ years. I will reflect on what I've done to make myself proud of myself, make my parents pround of me, or make my friends to be proud to have me as a friend. And once again, the answer is NOTHING. Need to keep improving. Hopefully, this year will be the time where I do something decent. Hopefully, I will be able to do something than to say and do nothing!

Over the last 3 weeks, I keep seeing her. This is more than just coincidence. Deep in my heart, I wanna know her. Yet, I keep letting the chance go. I saw her again today and with me being the coward self, I didn't do anything again..disappointing. Why I'm so shy, or so lacking in confidence, I don't know. Unless I can break this barrier, I know what I can expect of myself few years down the road...

start the ball rolling, 2010!!

today marks the start of year 2010. Year 2009 was past. As the saying goes, don't dwell on the past. That is what I will do. But before throwing all the events that had happened in 2009, let's have a recap of the key events or decisions made.

February:

It was during this period where I finally came to a decision as to what I want to study/do in the future. Whether my decision to study overseas is right or ambitious. We shall see. Nevertheless, I will try my best to make it a right one. This is one huge decision that I've made in 21 years, it will impact not just myself, but my parents as well. Now, its to look ahead and making the best out of the situation. I hope my goals are goals achievable and they won't deteriorate to dreams.

July:

My ORD month. 2 years has finally past. And this is the time where i no longer need to hold green card and wear no. 3 and face computers whole day long! My time at the unit was much better than I thought. It was not a bad experience to many others' army experience. This is hugely due to the work I do at my unit. It was a slacking one. Which I have no idea why someone can still complain in the unit. We are a fortunate batch, so don't complain! And the ORD week has been a good week to end the 2 years of army. My buddy and I didn't create much problems to the ma'ams & sirs. Hence, the treatment we have was good.

August/September:

I finally faced up to a situation which I have been hiding away. I didn't know where I picked up that bit of courage from, but I'm glad I did the right thing.

October/November:

Went for two 10km runs. One is the Nike Human Race, the other being the New Balance Real Run. Both were great. I'm no runner but I'm no quitter. And in both race, I didn't stop much. Quite pleased with myself, considering it was only until this year where I began to jog.

30th/31st December:

A dinner & movie outing with my 2 closest cliques of friends. I hope I didn't screw things up. Alvin & Chipmunks 2 was not bad. I only planned to have a good laugh at the film and it provided me what I want.

I didn't plan to have a haircut on the last day of the year. It's nothing about superstitions. But I end up having a hairstyle which fit my 3 requirements. And I ended up a satisfied customer. All thanks to the hairstylist Joey.

Went for a jog after the haircut, I wanted to give up & stop halfway thru' the run but I picked up my determination and pushed myself to hang on & finish it.

Year 2010 will be a year about studies. 110% effort will be needed. And to reward myself, the best present shall be a trip to the Universal Studios in Sentosa. Wait for me!! I'll be coming!!

To end this post, happy new year to my friends! The upcoming year shall be a good one and will be a good one. =)